I'm bored, and I have DSL now, so, in celebration, I've compiled a list.
THE TOP TEN BIGGEST BADASSES OF ALL TIME!
10.[eDWARD sCISSORHANDS]
Johnny Depp was going to make the list no matter what. He probably would make it 3 or 4 times. But since there is allowed only one character per actor, Edward Scissorhands is by far his most badass roll. Not only can he kick ass, he gets every damn lady in town. Thats just...badass.
9. [lESTER bURNHAM]
Funky dad goes through middle-age crisis, and becomes total badass old guy. Not too mention funny with a conscience. Has a hot wife, drinks raw eggs, and turns down hott virgin teens. Badass Quote: "You don't get to tell me what to do...ever again."
8. [jAMES bOND]
International spy, womanizer, vodka drinker, gun shooter, bomb deployer, witty sumbitch. James Bond is the shit in almost every aspect. Which is saying a lot for a British dude. The world need saving? Call on Bond. Bonus points for clever remarks after defeating each badguy and/or getting a woman in bed.
7. [tYLER dURDEN]
Leader of a cult, serious ass kicker, and you don't have to be fruity to admit that he looks damn good without a shirt on. Bonus points for the coffee cup robe.
6. [jULES wINNFIELD]
Preaching the bible before killing his prey. What is more badass than that? Apparently 5 other things...but its a lot more badass than everything else in the world! Bonus points for the "Bad Mother Fucker" wallet.
5. [wESTLEY]
No doubt about it, Westley easily makes the top 10 badasses. A pirate, undeniably charming, best swordsman in the land, slayer of giants, immune to poison, and looks damn good in a mask. Badass Quote: "NO! To the pain!"
4. [lEGOLAS]
Total badass. <--Is that getting repetitive? I think not. He's an elf, what more is there to say? He's SO badass, he can do an entire trilogy with long shiny blonde hair, and no one doubts his sexuality. Everyone knows that once Legolas goes back to the forest, illegitimate elf babies are made...then sent to Keebler.
3. [tHE tERMINATOR]
Robot from the future coming back to kill...and kick ass all the time. Don't even fuck around with this one. He's badass, that settles it. Bonus points for taking a bullet to the face, followed by: "Don't do dat"
2. [dARTH vADER]
The strongest force of evil, yet, the ultimate good. All badass. He can use the force, and chop off his son's hand without even being phased. Not to mention overpower his master and toss him to his doom. Badass Quote: "Do not underestimate the power of the dark side."
1. [lINK]
Straight from the Legend Of Zelda, this badass fights every monster ever to roam Hyrule and other worlds, has a hott princess lover in every adventure, sports a huge arsenal of weapons, travels through time, controls the weather, plays a mean Ocarina and any other instrument, wields crazy cool magic...shit...this badass mother fucker does everything, he can even wear a tunic without getting shit from no one. Link is, THE biggest badass of all time, no doubt about it.
There you have it. The top ten badasses of all time. Admire them, idolize them. And most of all, aspire to be just like them.
rUNNER uPS:
- mASTER cHIEF
- jAMES bOND
- mARTY mCFLY
~fuckin a
